Wednesday, January 1, 2014
THE WISH-@RIHANNA @CHRISBROWN (THERAPY)
"No! Absolutely not!" Glaring at the two people across from her, Robyn shook her head emphatically as she pushed her chair back and stood. Wrapping her arms around her waist for support and protection from the emotions that were starting to consume her, "And calling my mother to get her to ask me, was low." Robyn stormed over to the balcony, stepping out she took several breaths before glancing down. A dry chuckle escaped her lips. There they were, as they always were. They looked like ants…the paparazzi. They were there…always there, waiting to suck just a bit of her soul every time. She was never allowed an ounce of privacy to be happy or to hurt. If just once they could see what it felt like to be her, Christopher, Jay, Bey…just once, then they would have an idea of the gilded cage that surrounded celebrities. Her mind switched back to the situation at hand, Chris. She’d been trying so hard to get herself together. But was she ready for this?
Joyce and Greg glanced at each other. They had come on Chris’ behalf. His therapy at the center was going good. After 50 days, his improvement had astounded the staff; including Dr. Pratt, Chris’ therapist. It was the doctor, who’d suggested that they all…the family members take part in these latter sessions. Chris had agreed, excited at the thought of seeing his loved ones. All had gone amazingly well. That is until he’d asked for Robyn.
Greg leaned over to whisper into Joyce’s ear. “What do we do now?”
Joyce glanced back in Robyn’s direction. She could feel the hurt radiating from the young woman. “We give her time and tell Chris not yet.” She couldn’t help the sadness that seemed to grip her. Had the door been truly closed? How did they end up here?
“You two have so much unfinished business together it’s nowhere near funny.” Mel watched Robyn pace back and forth. She had been agitated ever since Momma Joyce and Greg’s visit. Mel knew better than most that Robyn wasn’t upset because she didn’t want to go. No she was upset because she wanted to go. Upset because she thought somewhere that giving in and going made her emotionally weak.
“He’s there to get the help he needs. How is rehashing our issues going to help him? I would think that it would just make things worse.” Robyn stopped pacing to flop down onto the sofa. Ollie ran to her, begging to be lifted up. Reaching down she picked him up, nuzzled his russet fur and laid him across her lap. He reminded her of the old days, when her life with Chris was more smiles, laughter and silliness, than anything else.
“Momma J said that Chris asked for you himself. If his therapist thinks it’s okay than he must be able to cope.” Reaching over, Mel ran a hand over Ollie’s back. “As mad as he has made me over these last months, I still love that boy.” She paused a second, watching her childhood friend, “And so do you.”
Robyn didn’t even bother to deny her friend’s words. “I know. But that doesn’t help me decide to go. If anything it helps me decide not to go. I don’t want him hurt again. I just want him to get the help and get out. He has so much to accomplish.”
Mel cold do nothing more than sake her head. No one knew the nights this girl sat up all night crying. The nights she’d stayed up with her, trying to keep her mind solid. They had known Chris since their teens and no one could tell Mel that he and Robyn didn’t belong together. She knew better. They just couldn’t get past their own bullheaded stubbornness. “Just give it more thought Robyn.”
“I tried baby.” Joyce spoke into the phone. “But Robyn was not open to the suggestion. Monica had no more luck than I did.”
Chris couldn’t help the wave of disappointment that took over his feelings. He knew it was a stretch. He’d been hoping she would call but all she’d done was send messages through Greg. She’d been off tour for a few weeks now and hadn’t come to visit him once. Maybe she meant it this time. Maybe she was finally tired. He couldn’t blame her. “Don’t worry about it momma. I knew she might not come.”
“She still cares baby, it’s just hard for her. She doesn’t want to see you in that place any more than I do.” Monica could hear the hurt and disappointment, but she’d seen the same emotions on Robyn’s face and knew this was far from over.
“Yeah…I know. She cares so much she’s avoiding me.
“Chris, that girl loves you and probably always will, but she was and is still hurt…just like you. You didn’t see her reaction, I did. She may not come there to visit. But once you are out, maybe the two of you can try as friends.” She refused to acknowledge that Karrueche person. That girl would reap her whirlwind soon enough. But she had a feeling little Miss Goldigger’s constant bid for attention was one of the reasons Robyn was so adamant about not visiting Chris. Joyce shook off the negative thoughts and moved her attention back to her child. “That might be a better solution.”
Chris paused, dropping his chin to his chest, eyes closed. Why did he feel like everything he wanted, needed was riding on Robyn? Why? “No worries momma.” His disappointment was there in his voice.
“I’m so sorry sweetie. Robyn just needs more time.” Joyce’s words were soft and full of love. “I love you baby.”
“I love you too momma.” Chris whispered back. She wasn’t coming. He had to deal with that. He had to get back to concentrating on his life. He had to work on getting his mind and heart together. She needed time, he couldn’t argue with that.
He just wished that she would come and see the progress he’d made.
Chris listened as Dr. Pratt finished her telephone conversation. He could tell by her voice she was a little nervous. He wondered what was going on. He didn’t have long to wait.
“That was Greg, he’s on his way up in the elevator right now.” Dr. Pratt watched the emotions play across Chris’ face. She knew he enjoyed the visits with his mother. He was in for a surprise today however. This was going to be more than just a visit. It was going to be family therapy. She decided to give him a heads up. “Chris I invited someone to join our session today.” She stopped to answer the knock. “Come in.”
Chris turned towards the door, wondering who the doctor had invited. He saw Greg first and rushed to give the older man a hug. This man had looked out for him. He had even reprimanded him when he needed it. He knew that Greg would always be there. Part of the reason he’d tried so hard to do well here was because of Greg. He wanted to make him proud. Funny Greg came before his father. Actually his father wasn’t in the top three. The three people he wanted to make proud were his mother, Greg and Robyn.
Moving away, Greg revealed his companion. Chris was prepared to see his mother, sister or one of his cousins. Kae hadn’t been up since Thanksgiving, so he knew she wasn’t it. Besides the doctor had never discussed her. He ran the names through his mind, but none matched the woman who stood in front of him. “Robz?”
Reaching out she hugged him, her body a bit stiff. “Hey baby.”
He couldn’t take his eyes off of her. She was here. She was actually here. He could tell that she was uncomfortable; eyes down, she sat stiffly in the corner of the couch. He was close enough to reach for her hand and so he did.
Robyn felt Chris take hold of her hand. She didn’t refuse his gesture but she only looked up when the doctor called her name. “Robyn?”
Dr. Pratt watched the young couple. They may not be together in the physical sense but they were definitely a couple. They seemed lost to her. Robyn had said no, but here she was. Chris had been unforgiving in the beginning but in the end he’d asked for Robyn. That told her that they each wanted to re-open the lines of communication. “How do you feel about being here?”
Glancing over at Chris from beneath her lashes, Robyn answered quietly, “Uncomfortable…happy…angry…sad.” She rattled out trying to tug her hand away to no success, stopping when Chris tightened his hold and shook his head slightly, and whispering, “No”.
Dr. Pratt watched their little tug of war. “Let’s start with uncomfortable. Do you know why?”
“I…I just am.” She caught herself. Why was she here? She asked herself for the hundredth time since finally agreeing to come. She knew the answer. Because it was time to stop running away from their problems together, her own issues as well as his. She had no love for the pressure that had been aimed at her prior to this visit. “I’m uncomfortable because I was put on the spot and pressured by those I know…those close. I know the choice was mine and that’s my responsibility but part of me still feels as if I …I had no choice.”
The doctor watched the young woman. Her words sounded agitated, her body language however was more nervous and unsure. “Why did you feel pressured?”
“It’s not…it.” She stopped and tried again. “I just felt it coming from all sides. Momma J wanted me to come. She was looking out for Chris…I know. Then there was my mom, who said that we needed to work out our issues and she’s right. Mel my best friend even got in on it. I just felt as though I had no choice. My heart knows they were right but my mind…”
“Your mind put up reservations.” Dr. Pratt finished for her.
“Yeah, but they are all right. He means a great deal to me. If I can help him I will and it’s time to stop running and face my problems, with myself, with him.” She actually felt slightly better.
“Very good. Now let’s tackle happy, angry and sad. Any order is fine.” This session was starting out much smoother than she thought.
“The sadness comes at the thought of him here…caged…medicated. Sadness because he seems so locked into his frustrations. I’m angry because I feel as if he chose this over us. Angry because if he doesn’t get it together this time what will happen next?” Turning suddenly towards Christopher, she asked, “What next Christopher? Jail? Hospital?” Staring into his eyes she whispered tearfully, “I can’t go there with you. That’s not where you belong! I want you well. Not acting out, hanging around those people. Why wouldn’t you listen?” The flood gates were open and the flood came. Snatching her hand away, “I’m angry because your mother is hurt…that sweet woman has shed so many tears over you and for what? So you can continue to act out? Your cousins can’t reach you, Mijo has been trying to get to you. Do you even talk to your old friends anymore? What about Aunt Christine? When was the last time you really had a good talk with her? She loves you so much and has always been one of your biggest cheerleaders. Everyone loves you so much. We only wanted what was best for you. I feel like a failure because I gave up and ran when things got to messy. That was wrong but in the end I feel like you made a fool out of me.”
“Why?” Dr. Pratt pushed the venting on. She sensed that this was a conversation they needed to have. She watched Christopher as Robyn spoke. The doctor noticed the intense play of emotions covering his face. In all of their sessions, he had never exhibited so much without uttering a word. But she knew the words were coming.
“Because I thought that when he came for me, it was for good. That when we decided to give it another try that it would be us against opinion. We knew it would be hard, we talked about it. I thought we were headed towards a sound commitment. That it would be just he and I. No instead it was him, me, Red, Hood and when my back was turned HER.”
“And Mel.” Chris jumped in and the doctor knew there was no holding anything back. She just sat back and let them open up.
“Left when we asked and bowed out when she felt we needed time.” Robyn answered. “Unlike your ‘friends’ thing one and thing two, who never left even when we asked. And please don’t get me started on that sneaky spare tire, hanging around like dingy wallpaper.
Dr. Pratt frowned, “Spare tire?”
Chris answered, “Kae.”
“Yes Kae. The one who always managed to show up and hang around you when I was gone. ‘We’re over you said. It wasn’t like that you said.” Flicking her hand at him she sneered. “Yeah right.”
“I keep telling you that it wasn’t like that. Your problem is you always believe what other people say!” he barked.
“Oh really!!! This coming from the fool who wants to believe whatever his basic ass rock dwelling friends whisper in his ear about me. Point of fact. She shouldn’t be around…even now she’s here visiting and showing up at court. Her motives and actions have not changed but you hold on to her and expect me to just nod and be okay with it!” Robyn felt her body shaking. She was starting to get a headache. “Would you be so accepting if I were hanging out with Matt? Riding around in his car? Showing up at his games? Having Matt post pictures on the internet?”
At Chris’ silence the doctor nudged “Chris can you give her an honest answer?”
“No…I wouldn’t.” Chris barked.
“Hypocrite!” She parried.
Chris gave way to his anger and hurt. “Kae was there when you weren’t. She was there when everybody turned their back on my ass! Me!” Chris jabbed his finger into his chest. “Even now she’s here and you aren’t. You couldn’t be bothered to stay and work things out. Not answering my calls
“BULLSHIT!!! I answered as many calls as you did! And don’t give me that ‘no one was there.’ We were there! Your mother was there, your cousins, your aunt, your true friends, my friends and ME but you weren’t. You fell into a pit and stayed there. Your mindset even changed. Your music changed. Mine did too because that is what we were feeling at the time. I went dark too. But I didn’t stay! I gave my friends and family the silent trip too but again, I didn’t stay that way.”
“FUCK THAT AND YOU!!!! You turned your back on me and kept it movin’! I never turned my back on you! Never! You went off and didn’t even look back!”
“Oh…you mean like you did when you turned your back on me that night and left me in that car! Left me there alone to face the police, the paramedics. Left me like I wasn’t shit to you. YOU LEFT ME…just like him!!! My father wasn’t shit then and neither were you that night!!!”
Everything stopped. The room quiet.
Chris knew in that instant what the wall was. Dropping to his knees, he cradled her face. “Babe, I am sooo sorry. I…I was scared. My mind went blank and when it came back, you were…I ran.”
“I was scared too. What happened that night was not just your fault. I was just as much to blame. But we knew each other’s back story. I knew about your stepdad, you knew about my dad. I thought that we would always have each other’s back…be there for each other no matter what. You abandoned me…you broke my heart.” The tears flowed as her voice broke.
“Babe…it never dawned on me. I didn’t think about it. I was so caught up in my own hurt.” Chris whispered.
“Yes you did Chrissy. You thought about it and then you put it away. It’s been there, festering becoming malignant. I know because it is the same with me. We’re broken.
“You’re right. Every time I think about it, I feel ashamed. I get angry…I lash out. I play it over and over in my head. I’m so sorry for leaving you there. I just…I ran. I went to my mom for comfort but who was comforting you? It should have been me. I kept pushing the memory away…tried to move on but… ” Her tears broke his heart. Kissing her wet eyelashes he whispered. “I’m so sorry. I love you.”
“We’ve both tried to move on but we can’t. I realize in this moment that I love you dearly but that there is a small part that doesn’t. I know now that I have to let it go…even if that means letting you go. Because I can’t heal. I still resent you for leaving me…so much so that I don’t trust you.” She confessed.
Chris refused to hear that choice. Now that he realized what she was fighting, what he was hiding. “No babe. That’s not the answer. We have to work through this. We both felt abandoned. I think that’s where we need to start. You’re here…I’m not letting you go…I can’t.
“Christopher…” Here was her chance. Was she going to take it or run? If she ran…nothing would be settled. They needed to heal. Since she was seventeen years old, she’d envisioned their life together as one. Was that just a young girl’s fairytale? She owed it to both of them to find out. If not, then at least they would be able to truly move on. “I love you.” Taking his hand she pulled him back up to sit on the couch, this time to sit closer to her.
Everyone knew exactly what role they played. The doctor’s role began now. “So let’s get started.”
The Home Alone Marathon…
Plopping down on the large bed in her suite, Robyn reached for the remote, flipping channels until she found the movie she wanted to see. Grabbing her bowl of popcorn, she settled down. Frowning slightly at her ringing cell phone before picking it up. “Hello?”
“Hey.” Chris’ smooth voice came across the line. “Whachu doin’?”
“Getting ready to watch ‘Home alone’ on AMC. Whachu doin?” She countered, smiling.
He laughed. “Getting ready to watch Home Alone with a special girl.”
Giggling she joked, “Is this our first date?” They had agreed to take things very slow. So slow that she had not visited him or called him outside of their weekly sessions. This was their first time ‘alone’ even if it was just by phone.
“Well it is a movie.” He returned. Switching the channel until the screen lit up with McCaulay Culkin shoving his older brother in the kitchen. “This is a good one.”
“I love this movie. Part two comes on tomorrow. Keep the change…” She offered, quoting a favored part of the movie.
“You filthy animal.” He finished the quote with her.”
“Home Alone Two…good a second date.” He proposed. They both laughed and settled down to watch the movie. It felt like old times.
The first commercial break, they scrambled.
“Have to get some popcorn. You makin’ me hungry crunching in my ear,”
“Is the kitchen still open? Or are you sneaking?” She asked softly.
“Naaa…but the station nurse lets us use their microwave.” He answered.
“Cool. Well while you do that, I’m going to the bathroom.”
“Five minutes? He offered.
“Five minutes.” She agreed.
“Hey.” He whispered into the phone.
“Hmm?” She murmured
“You fell asleep baby girl.” Chris used his pet name for her. He smiled at her soft yawn. She’d fallen asleep half an hour ago, but it didn’t matter to him. Just the sound of her breathing was enough to keep him happy. He missed her.
“I’m sorry.” Robyn hadn’t fallen asleep so quickly in years. Listening to him laugh and joke had lulled her into a sweet dream. She missed him.
“Don’t be sorry your snores are cute. “
“CHRISTOPHER MAURICE BROWN, I DO NOT SNORE!”
Chris laughed, “If you say so.”
“I don’t.” she sniffed.
He chuckled, “So are we on for tomorrow night?” he asked at her pause, he felt his heart stutter. But he didn’t have to worry. At this moment at least, they were on the same page.
“Sure.” She agreed happily. She’d enjoyed their phone date. Getting to know each other again was a wonderful experience.
“I’ll pick you up at seven-fifty.” He asked.
“Seven-fifty it is.” She agreed.
“Okay.” He didn’t want to hang up but she needed to sleep and so did he. “Alright babe, it’s time for bed. Night…night.”
“Good night.” She didn’t want to go, but she was sleepy and not quite sure that his phone or this phone call were sanctioned by the doctor. She didn’t want him to get into trouble.
The Dangers of Tickling
Chris nuzzled Robyn’s cheek. She’d finally agreed to see him outside of their counseling. Dr. Pratt had cautiously agreed to let them see one another as long as they kept things simple and stayed on the grounds. So here they were in the Commons Room, lying on the couch watching Wonder Woman. As usual…Robyn had fallen asleep. The girl couldn’t sit still and stay awake at the same time for more than 2 hours. No matter the movie or show, she always fell asleep. He nuzzled her again. “Babygirl…”
“Hmm?” Robyn snuggled back into his body. She was comfortable and had no intentions of waking up.
Smiling, he leaned down to whisper into her ear. “Wonder Woman went off.”
Her eyes popped open. “I missed the end!”
“Miss the end?” Chris laughed, “That episode is older than both of us. You’ve seen it what? Fifteen times at least. You know the ending to that simple ass episode.”
Sitting up, she twisted so that she could stare into his eyes. Poking him in the chest, she growled playfully, “Hey! Don’t make fun of Wonder Woman!” Jumping up from the couch, she grabbed a throw pillow and wacked him across the face, screaming “GIRL POWER!!!” and humming the tune to Wonder woman as she ran around the room, dodging his retaliation.
Chasing her, he whispered loudly “Girl you are going to get me thrown out of here! Shhh!” He tackled her by the couch, throwing her down to the cushions. Snatching her pillow, he tossed both pillows to the floor and began tickling her instead. Why did he do that? Her laughs grew louder. “Shhh!”
“Shhh? You keep…stop…boy!” she couldn’t complete her sentence.” She gave up trying to stop his fingers from tickling. Grabbing his shoulders, she tried to push him off, laughing.
Chris stopped suddenly, staring down at her. She looked the same as she did at seventeen when they’d tussled on a similar couch. Lowering his head, he captured her lips in an almost desperate kiss.
She didn’t fight, she didn’t avoid. She accepted his kiss, her lips falling open to welcome his invasion. It had been too long reacted to the intense feelings engulfing them. Too many nights alone… too many day wishing…wanting, trying to deal with a desire that grew stronger with absence. She wanted him so bad she could smell him. If nothing else she had to taste him, just once. Leaning up she met his mouth with her own, tasting and exploring.
Taking his cue from her. Chris intensified their kiss. Grasping a handful of her dark locks, he pulled her head back roughly. Using his tongue he traced her full luscious lips. ‘God, he’d dreamed of her lips; the feel of them, the taste of them. He nipped gently at the puffy lower lip, until she whimpered, her permission to move further…deeper. Sucking gently on the well teased lip, Chris allowed his hands to cup her face, holding her still for his oral invasion. He aggressively went after the prize, his tongue dueling and subduing hers. Nothing tasted so sweet.
Robyn deepened the kiss further, allowing her own tongue to entice. Her hands began exploring his body, delicately running up his arms to his strong neck. She’d always loved his arms. Thick and hard…made to carry a woman. She continued her exploration, moving over his t-shirt covered shoulder blades and roaming downward toward that magnificent ass. Their kiss so demanding, that she was sure her lips were bleeding. The more he took, the more she gave.
The more she gave, the more he wanted. He sent one hand searching gently beneath her sweatshirt. Black Pyramid…even now she supported him. Releasing the front hook of her br. His hand wandered over the sweet succulent valley of her breasts, he tested the weight of one perfect globe in his hand, squeezing the softness and teasing the already rigid nipple into a stiff pebble. Chris’ other hand glided slowly down her back, pushing into the top opening of her jeans to caress the soft skin of her behind. His fingers sought and found the crease that split her buttocks. Following the crease until he cupped a sweet butt cheek. He needed more! Never breaking the kiss, one-handed, he pushed her jeans further down her impossibly long legs slowly, he caressed every inch uncovered. His hand still searching. She felt like paradise…she felt like home.
Robyn’s own hands were doing a bit of exploration themselves. ‘The boy had the world’s greatest ass. There was no other like it. Her hands pushed and fought their way into the waste of his sweatpants, needing…wanting to touch flesh. When they finally found the warm flesh she sighed. When his hands caressed and molded the supple flesh of hers she moaned. “baaaabyyyy…”
Hot, hard and heavy. She needed more, he wanted more. Pulling his hand free from her jeans, he reached between them grabbing hold of her jeans he yanked them down pulling her thong with them. Grabbing his own pants he pulled his cock free of the material before taking her mouth in yet another bruising kiss. Rubbing his cock against her as his tongue moved in and out of her mouth mimicking the rhythm of loves age old dance of lust, fulfillment and love.
The feel of him snapped her out of her haze. Pulling her mouth away from his, Robyn had to catch her breath. She had to stop him, she had to stop herself. What were they doing? “Chris…Christopher!” Still fighting to catch her breath, she dodged his seeking lips. When he couldn’t capture her mouth again he settled on her throat, sucking and soothing the pulse that beat at the base of her throat. She was dying and in mere minutes they would be past the point of no return and that was definitely not a journey they needed to take right now. “Chrissy, please…we have to stop…please.”
Her voice came to him through a haze of lust. However it wasn’t her voice or the words that stopped him. It was the panic in her eyes. He had to stop for both of their sake. He couldn’t destroy the trust that they’d begun to rebuild over the last weeks. With one last caressing kiss, he pushed away from her, pulling up his pants. Reaching over, he helped her right her own cloths. “What do we do now?”
Shaking her head, almost speechless as the tears began. Her voice tearful. “I don’t know. But I don’t think we are ready for this.” Running her hands down his arms. “I think that was our problem last time.”
“What? Constant fucking, drinking, smoking and partying?” He answered, caressing her hair.
“Yeah and not enough talking.” She smiled.
“So let’s talk.” Chris smiled back.
“About what?” She pushed herself into the corner of the couch.
“Hmmm…let’s see.” Chris followed suit, pushing himself into the opposite corner, reaching for a cigarette but stopped at her words.
“Don’t smoke tonight.” Robyn pleaded. “Talk to me.”
“Okay.” Chris left the cigarette pack alone. “So why do you like Wonder Woman again?”
“Don’t start boy!”
A Little Family Fun
Chris bent down to place a kiss on his mother’s cheek. Before sitting down. It was amazing how things were changing in his life. He’d been at the clinic for almost seventy-five days. In that time, he’d learned to forgive. He’d learned to let bygones to be bygones. He’d learned that not everyone was his friend or out to get him. He’d learned that his mother would always want the best for him. He’d learned what opinions mattered and what opinions weren’t worth the time of day. He learned that his life was his responsibility. He spent time talking and listening. His therapy sessions with family were healing and his therapy with Robyn was soul stirring. His solo therapy helped him to understand himself. He now knew the difference between being alone and being lonely. The understanding…it felt good.
Though he was moving slowly, he was indeed gradually moving those who saw him as a commodity or a meal ticket out of his life. Looking around the dining room, he saw all of the same people who’d been there since day one; his mother, his aunt Christine, his cousins, his sister, his nephew, Uncle Greg, his best friend Mijo, Mel who to always had his back even if it was to tell him things he didn’t want to hear. And Robyn who had always been there, whether she wanted to or he wanted her to be or not. Even when she wasn’t physically there, she’d been in his mind and heart; always calling when he needed to hear her voice most.
“Chris! Christopher stop daydreaming boy!” Tootie handed him a plate. “Here boy.”
Laughing he took it. His gaze caught his mother huddled up with Robyn and Mel. No other girl had bonded with his family. No other girl had immersed him into her family. If he were honest with himself, that thought was as terrifying as it was soothing. “Excuse me ladies.” Sitting down between his mother and Robyn he thought, ‘this felt…natural’.
Pouring him a glass of coke, Robyn sat it down next to his plate, placing two rolls on his plate and waving away Greg’s offer. He smiled, she knew what he liked and what he didn’t. Handing her a dish, he realized, he knew what she liked and what she didn’t like as well.
Looking at the bowl of curry chicken, he smiled. “Awww…my babygirl cooked?”
“Shut up boy.” Smiling, she knew he liked her cooking and knew he loved her Curry. She spooned some onto his plate.
“That’s all I get?” He moaned.
Mijo shouted down the table. “Robz you know our boy is looking mighty hungry and lackin’!”
Gonzo piped in, “Boy we might need to hire a twenty-four hour cook, just to get you back to fighting weight.”
“We don’t have that much time. We are only allowed to be here for a few more hours.” Standing up, Mel grabbed the bowl of Curry Chicken. “Hold him down, I’ll shove the food in.”
Christine added, “I made my peach cobbler! That has to be good for a few pounds!”
Greg grabbed a can of coke, “I’ve got the chaser!” The table erupted in laughter.
Joyce laughed, she missed the days like this from the past. When ALL the kids were in the house…even Robyn and Mel. She loved hearing them joke and laugh. It made her feel happy and at peace. Smiling she settled down to eat.
“So how are you and Chris getting on?” Joyce asked coming to sit next to Robyn.
Looking up as Joyce sat down, Robyn smiled. “We are doing pretty good. Taking it slow…”
“Chris said that you and he were still seeing Dr. Pratt.”
Nodding, “Yeah. It has helped a lot. We do more talking now. Something we should have done a while ago. Learning what we each need. It’s been a process. But a healthy one.” Robyn answered. She loved this woman. Joyce had been like a mother to her and seeing her hurt over the past year had sadden Robyn.
Christine pushed Chris’ shoulder with her own. “Sooo?”
Chris looked over at his aunt. “Sooo…what?”
Christine slapped his shoulder. “You know what little boy. How are you and Robyn coming along?”
“I bet you been waiting all day to ask me that question, haven’t you?” Chris laughed, hugging his aunt.
“I’m waiting.” She would not be put off
“We’re doing good. Just learning about each other. Listening…really listening to one another. You know.” He answered, sobering up. “We are taking things slow.”
She happy to hear that. She’d always thought that they could have used more supervision in the beginning. But how do you control children making millions and traveling around the world. It wasn’t easy and she hadn’t and didn’t envy her sister or Monica. “Good. You two have a long history and a strong one. Give yourself time, there is no rush. You know each other.”
He heard his aunt’s words but his mind was shifting back to their last date, watching Wonder Woman. Things had gotten pretty close and she’d backed away. Still attending their sessions but her visits had tapered off. He hadn’t even seen her or his family for Christmas though others had come. Robz had been cool about it but he knew she was a little hurt. In their session she’d told Dr. Pratt that she’d moved past it and he believed her. She never brought it up again but asked that the visit be the last one. He’d agreed and began making arrangements to move on. He’d listed his house and with Robyn’s house sold, he wondered where to settle down next. He didn’t want to give up LA entirely but he wasn’t sure he wanted live there permanently. Robz had a nice condo in Barbados; her home. Maybe he should buy a nice estate in Virginia. In the future if things worked out, they might settle between the two together. Time would tell. Right now he just wanted their relationship as friends to strengthen and grow naturally. But lord he want her. Those pictures from Christmas in Barbados didn’t help. Especially since he’d saved them to his cell. He was still hard from those damn pictures.
“Chris?” Christine waved her hand in front of his face.
“Yeah…auntie. I hear you.” He snapped out of his thoughts. “We have time.”
Robyn sensed him before he even said a word. “You leaving with Mijo and Mel?” he asked. He wasn’t ready for her to go. It had been a wonderful day. He hated this part of any visit…the good byes. Reaching for her jacket, he helped her put it on.
“Yeah. I had a great time today. It felt like the old days.” She pushed her arms into the jacket. Suddenly finding herself in his arms. “Chris..”
“Stay…” He whispered, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her into his body. “Stay with me. I know we are moving fast…I know, but I need you.”
Rubbing her hands up his chest, she almost gave in. Leaning up on tip toes, she kissed his full lips gently. “You know we can’t. We almost got into trouble the last time. I can’t control myself around you. The last thing we want is to end up where we started. Slow…”
“Robyn, we are adults, we’ve been doing good in our sessions. We know what we need to do to keep things positive.” Holding her face, it was his turn to kiss. “Stay…”
She wavered. Lord she needed him…wanted him. “I…I.” It would be one night…”Robyn! Are you coming?!” Mel shouted, her voice snapping Robyn back into reality. “Yeah! Here I come!”
Kissing Chris one more time, she pulled away quickly before she changed her mind again. “I love you.”
“Love you too.” Chris knew there was no chance. Watching her leave, he felt so lonely. Welp! Back to the Barbados pics. He wished his ninety days were over. He wished he already had a home waiting for him in Virginia. He wished that Robyn were further along in their therapy. He wished he was further along in his therapy. So many wishes. But the one wish he’d kept tucked in his mind since day one of rehab…Robyn here in is arms. Waking up to those beautiful green eyes and that gorgeous smile. They had to get it together. He knew now that she was the one and he would spend as long as it took to prove it to her. Though he had a feeling she already knew. His wish was family, his and hers…coming together to create life. Staring up at the night sky, he spoke his wish. “Lord, I know you made her for me. I know you made me for her. Please help me get it together. Help us heal. I need her in my life. I want green-eyed babies, family picnics, Christmas at home and winters in Barbados. I want that and I will work hard to get there, just give me…her…us a little more help. Please.”
Looking at the hall clock, he saw that it was already ten o’clock. Walking to his room, he as struck at how quiet it was. Getting ready for bed, he grab his toiletries and headed for the shower. He was ready to go home…Virginia. It was time to quite acting out and get his business together. It was time to be the King she needed.
His wish would come true, no matter how long it took, it would come true. He had no doubt.
Part Two: The interlude up next